THE PHONE SELLERS' ANSWERS
Yep, sometimes we actually let a seller in... for instance when
they are well-prepared and have something we actually need. That's
how it works, you know!
Below you can find the "sales people's" input for WeDoNotUse.dk
and the first one is from Jonas Busekist, who gave us the idea to
get this stories online. Thank you Jonas!'
Best regards,
From Chad
Here in Texas, USA, I mostly only get recorded sales messages
(with the message halfway done when I pick up!), but I'm still
looking forward to the chance to try your method.
People looking for subscriptions are easy to get rid of; just tell
them that you allready subscribe. They have no time to verify it,
nor are they inclined to argue. They'll just thank you and hang up.
Donations are another thing. Just tell them that their collegue
called earlier, and then say "enjoy my contribution." Again,
they'll thank you, and hang up. No need to tell them that "earlier"
was last year, and that your "contribution" was to say a similar
thing. The only problem is that they'll flag you as a regular
customer and certainly call again next cycle.
I have worked as a telephone agent before, I know that if the call
is not easily categorizable, or if the customer was obviously
lying, they'll just schedule a callback of some kind. I know I
would. Also, Management can probably come up with a reason to
recycle phone numbers, no matter how the previous call ended.
Probably the only thing that would work is "wrong number" or
"number out of service", but an agent can't use those codes if
someone answers and gives the company name. The call might be
monitored, and an agent could lose his job for creatively coding
for a company which claimed was "going out of business" for
instance.
My personal voicemail messages all start with the "out of service"
tones before I begin speaking. This fools some automated
outdialers, but not the newest ones which are given a signal by the
phone company to tell service messages apart from actual connected
calls. Bill collectors use these now. Possibly, a company could set
up a voicemail box to have an authentic sounding service message as
outgoing message. When caller-ID shows a known salesperson ringing
in, the call could be answered with the handset on mute, and
immediately transferred to that box.
I hope I get a call from someone trying to sell life insurance.
I'll probably act very sick and tell them "I'm glad you called! I
just learned that I have terminal cancer!"
From Jonas Busekist
My name is Jonas Busekist, I'm 22 years old and I've worked as a
sales guy for over a year now. I heard about www.wedonotuse.com on
the radio, and afterwards I went to the site to see what the sales
people mean to the companies everyday life. Then it occurred to me…
Tell our (the sales people's) side of the story.
It's 8.30 Monday morning and I've entered the room in a good mood.
I sit down start eating my breakfast, I'd just been to the studio
recording a song I'd written and I was really pleased about the
result. So I was in a good mood!
The boss: Good morning everybody! My compliments on yesterdays
work, we achieved our goals so I'm buying everybody lunch to day.
Have a nice day at work!
I thought Yes! It's going to be a great day today! I pick up the
phone and I dial a number from my list.
Jonas: Good morning, this is Jonas from XXX I'd like to speak
to.....
The Voice: Stop it. I've had it. Don't you morons get that I hate
sales people, don't you have a life!!
Jonas: hey, hey, hey, could you just be a little polite....
*click*
He hung up.....GREAT, but hell no, if I was gonna let him ruin my
day!
I dial a new number.
Jonas: Good morning, this is Jonas from XXX I'd like to talk to
the company owner.
The voice: He died yesterday.....(crying)....
Jonas: Oh, (how are you supposed to respond to that?) I won't
disturb you anymore then....
Yeah, lovely beginning on a Monday morning, first a grumpy bastard
then Jensen's husbands death (if it wasn't just a cheap trick for
getting rid of me).
Yep, life as a sales guy can be pretty annoying sometimes. BUT. It
can also be the funniest and best job in the world!
For instance:
This is Jonas from XXX I'd like to talk to...
The voice: That's me, I'm glad you called. You're just the one I
need right now!! I'd like to have XXX Thanks a lot for your
help!
Sure, it's not everybody that loves us, but actually a lot of
people are really glad we're calling! That way they save the
trouble of going out and get things themselves! Or they discover
that we can actually save them of a lot of money! And that usually
means that they call back for more.
So next time you have a sales guy on the phone, be polite or fun
like Miracle, then we both hang up smiling!
Regards
Jonas Busekist
From Dennis Pedersen from Jyske Vestkysten
I work as a sales guy for Jyske Vestkysten (a Danish news paper)
and I really enjoy when people use ideas from WeDoNotUse.. it makes
a boring day a lot more fun! I had a customer on the phone last
week:
Me: Hello, you're talking to Dennis Pedersen fro Jydske
vestkysten
Customer: Yes?
Me: I hope I'm not disturbing you too much?
Customer: No, not at all…
Me: Okay.. Wwll, I'm calling you because I can see that you had a
news papaer subscription 6 months ago
Customer: Yes..
Me: Now we're actually selling the news paper cheaper around
Christmas.
Customer: We don't use Christmas..
Me: Okay? So you're not Christian?
Customer: Sure we are..
Me: Well, how come you don't celebrate Christmas then?
Customer: We do celebrate it…
Me: But didn't you just say…
Customer (interrupts): Sure, sure.. We do celebrate Christmas.. WE
just don't use it for anything.. Do you use Christmas for
something?
Me: eh.. well.. eh..
Customer: Couldn't you some up with a suggestion for using
Christmas? Cause I'm not interested in any news paper.
Hehe.. that's pretty difficult to give a smart answer to!
So please, for the sake of all sales people! Keep using
WeDONotUse! It makes our day a lot more fun!
From an anonymous writer
I'm a sales guy, not for private households but for business
life.
And I have to admit that I find your stories funny but also a
little pathetic.
I fully understand the objection to cheating-publishers and so on.
But selling regular products and services is a serious foundation
for Danish business.
Rejecting a sales guy just because he is a sales guy - only shows
that the rejecter lacks sense and seriousness to his own
company.
Anybody can say yes to the following:
1. I want to be ahead of development
2. I want my company to be optimal on all areas
3. I want to minimize expenses
And since company optimizing is depending on others developing
products and since ever company purchase products in order to be
optimal - it is completely stupid to reject the guy how offers
optimising and savings just because his a sales guy.
Furthermore it is a symptom for employees who lack power and
latitude in their job try to be superior by acting superior to
sales people.
You may shake your head and laugh when you hang up. But believe
me… The sales guy is shaking his head even more at the thought of a
company can send such a closed and prejudice signal to everybody
else.
And the day where you need a certain product, the sales
guy/consultant will remember your attitude - and the
service/treatment you'll receive will have very low priority.
Think about it next time you reject someone how selling toner,
phones or what ever: maybe you'll actually cheat yourself or your
boss for a mayor reduction of expenses. Would a boss appreciate
that?
From Mia
Great web-site!!!
I'm a sales consultant and received this link when I called a
customer how actually started this site.
But we had a nice talk - about everything else but my product
though.
The great thing about this job is when there's someone in the
other end of the line who actually poses both humour and a good
mood..
Thanks for the chat...
From Robert
I used to work as a sales consultant for a while and I have about
3000 possible customers on my mind. The following customers always
made me in a bad mood:
- The man buying everything just because his wife's standing in
the back being furious and commanding him NOT to buy anything at
all
- The lonely ones who happy somebody's finally calling and who
won't be interrupted till he's told you about all of his children
and what their profession is
- The wife who won't let go of the phone because she's convinced
that she's capable of making the decision, but ends up handing the
phone to her husband
- Those who can't figure out a way to tell you, they're not
interested and therefore asks for brochures or asks you to call
back in a couple of months
- "funny" comments that weren't funny the previous 20 times you've
already heard
- People having died, so you're met with tears and crying
- Rage from people who presume sales consultants are idiots
I could actually put up with most of it, as long as people didn't
get me in a bad mood. Cause 5 seconds later I was going to call the
next one.
From an anonymous writer
I'm sitting here laughing out loud over this web-site. Laughing at
how you basically have made a hand book in how to get rid of a
sales consultant as quick as possible. It is rather comic. That you
feel too proud and so on that you have rejected another
consultant?? As it is mentioned in one of the stories the
consultant might as well be calling from "Animal Protection" or a
company that might actually have a good offer and if the offer
doesn't appeal to you, say it God damn it!! And say that you don't
want to buy it. It is after all the most logical answer. What's the
consultant supposed to say to that? I can easily understand that
you don't like constantly being disturbed.
And by the way: A good sales consultant could easily continue his
sale after you've made your "do not use" comment hehe. A good sales
guy knows when a customer is lying or is telling a phoney story, I
just think it's childish and a little lame and therefore I often
answer "Eh goodbye" because I understand the message behind what's
being said but saying "I don't buy anything" (which is more
accurate) would be more reliable. Bat as we say in the business
"Customers are the stupidest animals" ;-)
Good luck with your defence.
From a telephone seller.